Tuesday, January 03, 2006

Tough Crowd in the ER Lately........











Yep, it's been really strange in the ER lately. The holiday season escalates the Zombie traffic something fierce. This photo gives you an idea of the clientele we've been seeing lately. One of the Nurses mentioned that she "must have dropped a couple of Vicodin in the elevator" as she walked through the waiting area ........ well, you see how it goes.

Seriously, the last few weeks has been a full scale "Attack of the Drug Seekers". Zombies I haven't seen in years have been making appearances. People who I know have moved to points far away, are stopping by for the holidays in hopes of a syringe full of Diluadid and a script of Vicodin. Crazy shit.

I'm guessing here, but this is how I envision a Zombie date night being planned.
Zombie #1 - "How about dinner and then go see a movie?"
Zombie #2 - "Sure, sounds good. Then we can swing by the ER and complain about having a migraine, backpain or some shit and get some drugs."
Zombie #1 - "Cool. We'll get some beer on the way home. After we go to WalMart"

Remember who to thank the next time you find yourself waiting forever to get into see a Doctor in your local ER.

I did get to have a little fun this weekend though. Some of the regular Zombies from my OTHER ER job made the trek over to try and scam us Sunday night. I love squashing Zombie drug scams. They get pissed. You can hear them grinding the nubs of their Meth teeth together and cursing. I love it.

According to the New York Times, Dick Cheney must feel like that when he's oppressing all those little brown people.

No really, it feels good to stymie Zombies who waste your time, take up space needed by actual sick people and demand first class narcotics they have no intention of paying for.

Actually, if you have a job and pay taxes - you're paying for them. No, don't hold your breath waiting to be thanked. Not gonna happen.
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